Live for this

I've been here pondering everything I need to do before I leave. I need to pay about $1000 in tickets and about $800 in emergency room fees. I decided that since I most likely won't have that all taken care of by the time I leave, I will just have them take $50 each from a bank account monthly. Good idea? I think it's the best I can come up with. And I know you're thinking, "Why the fuck doesn't she just move after she's paid, like, later on?" Well, honestly I can barely handle another month, week, day here. Prior to living here for 10 1/2 years I lived in 4 other states and many other cities. I don't know how I didn't just leave the day I graduated from high school because of how long I've been here in comparison to everywhere else. Wait, I know why, it's because my best friends at the time probably would not have liked that very much. Lucky for them I didn't have a magic crystal ball telling me that it won't be the same with them not a year later. If I would've known I probably would've selfishly peaced the fuck out the day before my 18th birthday. It sounds kind of mean, but as I get older I keep realizing that everyone just needs to do what they want or what they feel is right for themselves.

So, now I'm stuck trying to get what I want to do figured completely out and explain to those who matter why. But, the people I love should understand, right?


NEW TOPIC!


I potentially may get a second job. I don't want to, but I need to. My main occupation is very slow between the end of January and the middle of July. I only want to work 10-20 hours a week more and Nordstrom just can't supply me with that now. And every time they send out a "Who wants to leave early, because almost everyone can!?" email, it's hard to not hit the LVEA button and gallivant right out of that place. If I get a second job, I'd legitimately get the hours and money I need without the temptation of leaving early to be social or lazy.

So, question is...which of the two nearby businesses should I work at, the gas station or the Tobacco Outlet. Either way, both will hinder me from even thinking about quitting smoking. Ha.